I’ve been neglecting this blog and social media lately because I spent the last 9 or 10 days being sick. Like pray-to-a-god-I-don’t-believe-in kind of sick. I spent the earlier part of last week being convinced that I had contracted malaria from my recent trip to Cameroon (I don’t) while hoping that it was just a tiny, short-lived illness that would pass in a few days (it didn’t). The upside to being sick, however, is that it allowed me to take a couple of sick days during which I had the house to myself, and I was able to engage in some of my secret single behaviors. You know, the things I like to do when I have the house to myself. Here are some of my favorite secret single behaviors:
Secret Single Behaviors
- All the beauty maintenance activities: baths, eyebrows, whiten teeth, examining all the pores, mud masks, paint nails, etc.
- Practice ballet and jazz: I love to dance across the hardwood in the living doing floor combinations. The living room isn’t very big so I have to keep my moves pretty tight. This activity doesn’t last long when I’m sick.
- Watch all of Bravo’s finest: Real Housewives of BH, OC, and NJ paired with a little Pump Rules = A+
- And then watch an episode of Buffy. OR read one of my Buffy Season 8 or 9. Because yes, they exist and they are awesome.
- Snack like a beast: All the yummies will be mine, completely guilt free. I’m talking Mac & Cheese, cookie dough, and wasabi peas. Not all at once, I promise.
- If I don’t leave the house, I don’t leave my pajamas. Obviously.
- Listen to Blow by Kesha on repeat. Best pump up song.
- Be terrified that someone is trying to break into the house: To be fair, I experience this every day.
- Speak my thoughts. To myself. Similar to talking to myself but less creepy … right?
- Snuggle with a pillow when napping. We all do it, right?
- Cry. Mostly over really touching episodes of Law & Order: SVU, Criminal Minds, etc.
- Lose track of time in the black hole that is Pinterest. Followed by instagram. And then get angry when people aren’t updating fast enough to keep up with my media consumption.